My weekend and what I learned:
1. If any of you have seen the big solid rock church just outside of Cincy, i don't bet you know this: the guy who founded the church was one of the biggest coke dealers ever to pass through this state. After having "found jesus" he decided to make this huge ass astrodome-like thing on the highway, complete with baptismal pool/pond. Recently a huge, HUGE white jesus statue has been built to look as though it's rising out of the water like the krakken. I think you can see it from space or something. Anyway, I pointed out the irony of an ex cokehead building a large white statue of jesus that looks suspiciously like... coke. From henceforth, we shall refer to this as the cocain jesus. Also, the name "solid rock" takes on a whole new meaning, eh?
2. Bluegrass Kentucky is some fucking crazy beautiful country.
3. No matter where I go I can still manage to get more books than i will ever be able to read within a reasonable lifetime.
4. Everyone in nashville is insanely beautiful.
5. Boys like me but folks turn away.
6. I am, in fact, able to put on my make up entirely in the dark.
7. Shakers are some strange motherfuckers.
8. Geese seem to have one goal on life: to try to kill me.
9. People in Tennessee can sell cars without tops and actually leave the tops down outside for days at a time because they are confident their weather will not change, like, say, in Ohio,
10. Doing laundry on a sunday can make you clinically depressed; there is a book about this, I swear.
11. Big Bob's carpet is actually Big Bob's "used" carpet. Not many people realize this, and I think we all know what this entails.
12. I can no longer hate the Beatles because Abbey Road is actually a pretty amazing record.
13. Key lime martinis are officially the shit.
